lessons from butterflies

 it was never said

that emerging from the cocoon

would be a painless process.

~ekg

I wrote this in my journal last night. the thought came to me from the Spirit, no doubt- a fact I know because of (a) the feeling I got when I thought of it- it matched how I feel when I’m feeling the Spirit. and (b) the fact that this thought matched exactly what I needed at that very moment, and still need at this point in my life.

does anyone else ever feel like their thoughts are bigger than their efforts? like, we have our dreams, we make our dreams, we go to achieve our dreams...and suddenly we’re swallowed up by memories of the past and fears of the future. we try to get back to the present, but let’s be honest- it hurts! it flat-out hurts sometimes.

but why?

I posted a picture on Instagram at the beginning of the year that compared 2019 to us as caterpillars, 2020 to the period we are in the cocoon, and 2021 to the period that we become the butterfly. with that mindset, we might have thought (well, I kind of thought) that since we’re butterflies now, that means we can just take off and fly, right?

not so.

have you ever seen a butterfly that can fly right after it finishes its transformation process? ‘cause I haven’t. first, a butterfly has to get OUT of the cocoon- which we can assume isn’t a quick and easy process. and then it has to wait for its wings to dry and become strong enough so it can take off. and- this is just what I am assuming- I don’t think a butterfly is very good at flying when it first starts out. maybe it’s not used to using its new wings yet. maybe they get sore after a while. maybe it wonders why it has to learn how to fly when it could just still be on the ground as a caterpillar- not expected to do anything except crawl around and eat leaves and get fat.

okay, so maybe the butterfly doesn’t really have these exact thoughts, but I think we do, as human beings. maybe we aren’t so good at trying a new way of thinking, or starting a new goal, or just getting out of bed in the morning because heaven knows that’s a task in and of itself. maybe our muscles are sore- not just physically, but mentally and emotionally too. maybe we wonder why we have to do all these hard things when we could just go back to our old way of doing things, when so little was expected of us.

and we could try to go back. a butterfly could try to go back to being a caterpillar, and just give up on flying. but we cannot hide the fact that, like it or not, we have changed. a butterfly could call it quits and just not fly and try to go back to being a caterpillar- but it can’t hide its new wings. it could, like, get them cut off, but I kinda feel like that would hurt and, y’know, maybe kill the butterfly.

so it is with us. we could try to go back to the way we were before- our old ways of thinking, doing things, and just give up on our goals- but we cannot hide what being in the cocoon has done for us. we could go back to those old ways, but we would not feel the same while doing them. and, like the butterfly, we could “cut off our wings,” as it were, but that could hurt us immensely, and while it maybe wouldn’t kill us physically (or I hope it wouldn’t!) it would most definitely kill us spiritually and emotionally.

so, I highly doubt anyone wants to kill their soul. the whole reason we’re here is to prevent that from happening! and so what that means to me is: even though the process of emerging from the cocoon and learning how to fly may hurt, and we may not know what we are doing- God knows what we are doing. He has a plan for us. and if we just trust in Him, we can learn how to fly.

and when we do, we’ll be in a much, MUCH better place than if we never even started in the first place. we’ll be able to go to places we never even dreamed of- and our souls will be more alive than ever.

blissfully yours,

Emma <3